Rising Signs as Grocery Shoppers

Because nothing exposes your vibe faster than how you navigate a fluorescent-lit produce section.

Aries Rising

Speed-walks the aisles like it’s a competitive sport. No list. No plan. Leaves with energy drinks, frozen dumplings, and a single lime.

Taurus Rising

Famers market or nothing. Will wait in line for $24 for artisanal honey. Leaves with imported cheese, heirloom tomatoes, and zero regrets.

Gemini Rising

Talks to three strangers, calls a friend mid-aisle, and narrates their internal debate out loud. Leaves with snacks, gossip, and maybe shampoo?

Cancer Rising

Has a handwritten list, a reusable tote, and a deep emotional attachment to the cashier named Greg. Buys soup ingredients just in case.

Leo Rising

Dressed like someone might be filming them. Buys the prettiest produce, fancy sparkling water, and flowers—for themselves, obviously.

Virgo Rising

The cart is color-coded. The list is alphabetized. The produce is weighed. Somehow checks out in under six minutes with zero social interaction.

Libra Rising

Spends 45 minutes in the wine aisle reading label fonts. Buys oat milk, a baguette, and four things they’ll return tomorrow out of principle.

Scorpio Rising

Knows the store layout better than the employees. Never makes eye contact. Leaves with protein, blackberries, and something mysterious in a paper bag.

Sagittarius Rising

Forgets the list. Buys three types of hot sauce, a pineapple, and a family-sized trail mix. Leaves with new life goals and a travel itch.

Capricorn Rising

Efficient. Budget-conscious. Already meal-planned and did the math. Buys in bulk and judges your name-brand granola.

Aquarius Rising

Impulse-buys mushroom jerky, kombucha, and toothpaste tablets. Brings their own container for bulk quinoa. Has thoughts about late-stage capitalism.

Pisces Rising

Wanders aimlessly. Buys whatever “feels right.” Leaves with lavender tea, goat cheese, and a candle shaped like a moon.